WEST HOLLYWOOD – Many gay men are dismayed by the humdrum sex life that marriage brings and are now filing for divorce and fighting to strengthen laws that limit marriage to heterosexuals. It seems that many that married before the ban are now learning about the three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
Lawrence Yaeger and Alan Levy got married last year, imagining they’d spend the rest of their years together in domestic bliss. Instead, both say their relationship has soured to the point where they’re filing for one of the county’s first gay divorces.
After their raucous honeymoon in Barbados, Jaeger and Levy settled into married life. The first two months went just fine, but things went south quickly.
“Just because we’re ’same sex’ technically doesn’t mean it has to be the ’same old sex’ all the time! Alan is so literal — it’s like he became boring overnight. Maybe it’s not Alan. Maybe it’s the institution of marriage. I don’t know. It’s all so confusing. See?! It’s just awful. I want out.”
Meanwhile, Christians are delighted by the newfound plight of homosexuals: “God is giving them a little taste of their own medicine. Let’s see how they like it.”
But Levy’s partner, Yaeger, counters that it came down to domestic issues. “I told him that since we were married, we had to do things like stick to a budget. He didn’t like that,” says Yaeger, an accountant. “My mom was right about him — he was only in it for the money.”
While Yaeger is still upset about the breakup, he believes he’ll consider marriage again. “But next time,” says Yaeger, “I’ll spend more time putting my fist down and less time putting it in.”
